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241: Justice League-The Craft Services Cut

So … it’s finally happening. The elusive Snyder Cut will hit HBO Max next year. How? Why? What? WHAT?!?! And at twice the original length?!? We puzzle over how this will come about. Extra characters? Extra subplots? Mirrors? All without reshoots? But…. how? We’re baffled. Join us for this and lots more! Batwoman recasting! Mandalorian casting! We go over another #release’SOME DIRECTOR’S’ cut. And in a warm up we do a Snyderesque game of Character Storm! And we postulate on OTHER films that demand a director’s cut! #releasethefattermartiancut !

 

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239: I’m Weisz to You

So, this episode gets a little weird, for some reason! We’ve got some really interesting news about the current state of the comic book industry, and Merk has a very fun quiz, but then, in our main segment, which is supposed to be all about the current changes that are being, by necessity, forced on the MCU, the audio has been completely corrupted and
w𝔼 ţα𝓛𝓀 A𝓁ᒪ 𝐀𝔹σǗ𝐓 B𝓛𝐀ℂ𝐊 ωⓘ𝓓σฬ, ᗯ𝓗Ɨᑕʰ ᶤ’ï¼­ şⓊ尺𝕖 𝐄𝓿έ𝕣ץo𝕟𝒆’𝕤 ѕ𝔢ᵉη Ãt 𝕥ʰ𝕚S Ƥ𝑜ι𝓃ᵗ, sσ ωe 𝔡𝕆𝓝’𝓉 яe𝔞Ⓛ𝐥Y ℂ𝐨ᑎς𝐄𝐑ⓝ 𝓞ᑌяѕᗴᒪғ 𝐖ιŦᕼ şPỖƗᒪᗴⓇ𝐒! ţⒽ𝕚ⓢ Ⓦ𝒶s 𝐀 𝔠尺𝕒乙𝕪 M𝕠ν𝕚ⓔ AήⒹpefully it’s still mostly listenable. Again, though, our apologies!

 

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238: The Lumberjack Buddy Cop Movie


This week is a delight! We return for another dramatic reading of a Fletcher Hanks masterpiece…. not one, but TWO Big Red McLane stories! Big Red McLane: King of the Northwoods! Let’s go lumberjackin’ eh?! These are hilarious. The engrossing absurdity of Fletcher Hanks is something everyone needs to experience. Join us as we talk about the Teenage Mutant Lumberjack Turtles, have a returning visit from Thomas Haden Church, discuss whether one fictional character makes something Cancon and come up with the greatest Canadian crossover event EVER….. BIG RED MCLANE and the LOG DRIVER’S WALTZ!!! Join us, won’t you?

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235: 3 Rosenbaums and a Snyder Cut

Well Easter just went by so it’s time for the boys to take a look at comic characters that come back from the dead….. so basically everyone. But they do explore the hilarity of a few like Jean Grey (obviously), Thor, Superman, Xavier (why do his kids keep killing him?), Bucky, Jason Todd, Aunt May and everyone’s favourite MR IMMORTAL!! We also take on a topic suggested by a listener, Manuel, where we delve into the monopoly that is Diamond Distribution. All that plus Didio talks New 52 & Rebirth, Comicsgate silliness and the amazing Marsha Cooke, and Michael Rosenbaum, Rosenbaum, ROSENBAUM!!! Join us (from an appropriate distance) won’t you?

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234: The Shredder’s a Real Blanche

30 years ago, the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was unleashed on the world! To comic fans of a, uh, certain age, this movie was a definitive cinema experience. But a lifetime later, how does it hold up? We discuss the legacy of this indie comics classic, compare it to the TMNT’s later adaptations, discuss its standing amongst the incredible growth of comic movies since, talk about our favourite moments, the bodacious cast, those Henson Company animatronic suits, a bunch of production trivia and goofs, little-known deleted scenes, and SO much more. It’s… Bossanova? …Chevy Nova? (Excellent!!)

Get your dose of Turtle Power in a very special Z-E-R-O ISSUES PODCAST!


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232: Hex Hex Lightning Bolt Battling Covid 19

Self Isolation! Social Distancing! Disease Lockdown! How do i get my comics?!?! With all this craziness going on, we aren’t able to do a ‘regular’ stupid episode of the podcast…. so we’ve put together a ‘Special’ stupid episode of the podcast! Outtakes! Bloopers! Unreleased bits! Hilarity! We’re here to make you laugh and be silly in these weird, strange, dire toilet paper endtimes. So join us for a 30 minute rocket ride into our brains and laugh it up, fuzzballs, ’cause we’re using our HEX HEX LIGHTNING BOLT to battle COVID 19!

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231: But Does He Have a Butt Gun?

Our semi annual…er… bi-annual…. or…. whenever we fell it it….March Madness is back!!! We each secretly choose characters and then throw them into a round robin tournament… a battle to the last!! 8 comic characters whittled down to ONE CHAMPION!!! Several robots! One X-man! Two Japanese sourced warriors! One weird guy that does ‘criss cross apple sauce’! One symbol of a country! And one in fishnets that will throat punch you into next week! Join us for this battle to the last, as we ask ‘But does he have a butt gun?’

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229: A Batman who Washes His Ass

Holy smokes, did you know there’s a new Batman movie in the works right now, helmed by Matt Reeves and starring Robert Pattinson? So I guess there won’t be anyone else playing Batman after this, he’s the last one, nobody else will ever play Batman.

Despite this, we do our best to recast Batman and his allies and enemies, just in case they do ever decide to make another Batman movie. Y’know, just in case!

Plus: Dan DiDio’s ousting from DC, all the hot ToyFair news, the cast reveal for Kevin Smith’s Masters of the Universe: Revelation, and Kyle tells us about The Fourth Planet, a comic series from someone we aren’t attempting to fource a bitter rivalry with.

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225: As Long as Jon Cryer gets Punched in the Face

Let’s ARROWVERSE the %^$# out of this! Crisis! The end of Arrow (Bry is ecstatic!). A spoiler filled exploration of the CW trainwreck that we kinda like…. kinda….. plus so much more! The Marvel Hulu debacle! Obi Wan does Weekend at Bernies! Old Man Picard! Old Man Gambit! CW beard! Spectre Crackhead! Luke Wilson is hot again! We go gagga over Brandon Routh’s hot bod! Kyle has a new game and it’s got Burt Ward all over it. And real life intrudes! Kyle is stuck on the highway and calls it in! Will he get to the show?!?! Will he make it out alive!?!? Or will he be the shell of a man?!?!? Tune in! Same ZERO ISSUE time! Same ZERO ISSUE channel!

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223: It’s a Terrible

IT’S A TERRIBLE…costume. Terrible. The worst. Which character wins THAT distinct honour? There are plenty battling in that secret war. Join us as we discuss ridiculous costumes! PLUS…. we go over a bevy of movie news, from Christian Bale’s reported talks to join Thor, to Scott Derrickson exiting Dr Strange, and the new New Mutants trailer, Morbius rumblings and the ‘indefinite delay’ of the Hawkeye series (it may have been because he was going to wear THIS costume). All that AND Kyle debuts a new warm up game! BLOCKBUSTER STORM!! PS- Bon Jovi hates apes.

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