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Newsflash: February 6, 2023

WHOA! Have we got a LOT to talk about on the news…. in a short time! It’s a Zero Issues Newsflash Monday News episode and we’re talking about the DC Film announcements from James Gunn & Peter Safran! What’s staying? What’s the link to the new stuff? What IS the new stuff? What are WE excited about? What’s going to be the tough sell? And SO MUCH MORE!

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Newsflash: January 23, 2023

The newsboys are back for another ZERO ISSUES NEWSFLASH! It’s the beginning of the end of the beginning of the Venomverse, but the Denim Gwenomverse will surely endure. ComiXology suffers another brutal blow by their owners at Amazon. Crystal Dynamics’ Avengers game is closing up shop and giving away the extras its first-day fans paid big for. That Wilkin Boy, the Archie sensation we definitely all remember, is back – in horror spin-off form! Jason Momoa meets with the new DC Studios bosses and right on, my man, he likes what he hears! Are James Gunn and his “Guardians of the Galaxy” cast DCU BFFs, and does the idea make us happy or angry? And last but not least, are retailers’ frustrations with event creep and endless variant covers reaching critical mass? Find out! Here! In this breaking-ish news update!

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368: A James Gunn Rock-Afire Explosion

It’s beginning to look a lot like CHAOS! Usually we’d have a short bit of holly-jolly fun for you this week, but the DCU rumours and news and rumours and announcements and responses and outright lies for clicks are flying fast, and we are forced to do this holiday season wacky-backwards style and take a look back, and a look forward, at the state of the DCU and predictions for what we’ll see in the future! And also comics, we also do that for comics in general. (But we’re not too happy to be trapped in the Fandome again, so we may get extra raunchy! Consider that a warning, youse.)

Oh, but there’s so much other news! The TMNT and Usagi team up one more time at IDW, Netflix closes an umbrella as their programming gets mysterious and spooky and altogether ooky, The Boys give the world the first good NFT, and we share some “very real” news articles from a comic-news site that will not be named here! Hey, year’s almost over, let’s get wild!

Disclaimer: This series is not officially affiliated with the successful comedy podcast Cum Town. Officially. O…fficially.

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330: It’s Disgusting Shakespeare, Is What It Is

Peacemaker cameth and wenteth, and we have many thoughts on what we have seen! How did the show rapidly evolve? What made it even possible? What parts do we especially love as shameless James Gunn fans? How amazing was that cast as a whole? What could possibly be in store for season two? And how about those last-episode cameos that we’re not sure if it’s cool to casually talk about in an episode description?? But we’ve got another special treat in honour of this hard-R foul gross-out romp: we don’t even TRY to bleep our swears or edit out our disgusting tangents! You’re welcome (we’re sorry)! May want to put in the headphones if there are kids around, seriously.

Oh, you think that’s all? Listen friend, don’t even worry about it, we’ve got multiple segments on this show! We talk about the new “Doctor Strange and the Multiverse of Madness” trailer, somehow both speculating and commenting on the state of over-speculation for literally everything. We’ve got news! Comixology updates and finally fully integrates with Amazon and nobody is happy about it, not even one bit! DC’s Wonder Twins are getting a movie on HBO Max (no, really)! And more!? And more!

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312: Morbius, Morbius, Morbius, and Kevin Bacon

The Spooky Month continues, and this week it’s our spookiest trick yet – fixing a character! Namely, good ol’ living vampire Michael “Morbius” Morbius! Now Morbius is a perfectly fine science vampire, but for some reason we just can’t sink our teeth into the character as much as we’d like. So Merk, Bry ’n Kyle all reinvent the character in their own weird ways! So bite into this episode for some royal vampire intrigue, a cavern of underground monsters, and all the Australian blood and quokkas you can handle! Bwah! Plasma!!

But, oh no! The DC Fandome has descended on our podcast once more! To escape, we must discuss a bunch of the new DC movie teasers and decide which one looks the coolest! And we’re running out of air in here! Listen fast!

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307: Wayne Knight’s Driving the Van

Once again, we are settling age old comic book debates this week. Is The Punisher a villain? What’s better, Kirby’s Marvel work or his DC work? Has Shazam always just been a Superman ripoff? Those questions and exactly three others will be answered.

Plus! We rank the various Sinster Six…es that have existed to find who among them is the most sinister, cover the ongoing Joe Bennett scandal, and rejoice that Gwensborn isn’t canon anymore.

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306: Third Time’s the Swarm!

We haven’t seen Shang-Chi yet, so instead we’re doing another exciting LIGHTNING ROUND! Join us for so many mini-topics you’re guaranteed* to find something you love! Comic characters hosting podcasts! A quiz about quizzes! New kid sidekicks for Wolverine! New “Batman ’89” style comics based on long-dead comic movies! A remote-recorded version of a 1991 Marvel Trading Card game! A “Read This Now” profile on “Memetic” by James Tynion IV, Eryk Donovan and Adam Guzowski! Collection treasures that we regret selling or losing! And an all-new segment about comic characters’ kinks! We really ended the episode with that one! Listen, we can prove it!!

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287: Jim Cummings

Chocolate and peanut butter, cats and dogs living together, monkeys fighting lizards, that’s what this episode’s all about! We’re taking things that should not be together, and smashing them against each other like so many…smashy…thingies…

Moon Knight and The Question come to kick ass and chew bubble gum, Samus Aran fights a xenomorph, and Kyle mistakenly believes that Jim Cummings did the voice of Beastly on Care Bears! He didn’t! What a dummo!

Brought to you by our wicked smaht sponsor: Rose N Crantz Coffee! (Use the promo code zeroissues to save 10%!)

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283: Do You Know What Happens to Darkseid When he’s Hit By Lightning?

Since the beginning, the superhero works of Zack Snyder have loomed large over this podcast. The source of debates, disagreements, and endless jokes. But now, our greatest challenge yet has arrived, and the team is united as they… watch Zack Snyder’s Justice League and talk about it for a while, I dunno! But that’s not all: Jamie “The Roastmaster” Nichols joins to help, bringing the perspective of a movie fan who doesn’t know much about the original comics! But first: What is the Mystery of Meemaw? Can you pinpoint the exact place we stopped bothering to bleep out F-words? Can you guess which one of us was secretly Martian Manhunter the whole time? Find out as you reach around into this extra-long, extra-sweary episode brought to you by RNC Coffee (promo code: zeroissues) and The Goofy Movie on Disney Plus!

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256: Absolutely Not a Made Up Name for a Planet

Listen along to another Power Records double feature, starring The Flash and Aquaman! First, the Flash has to fight not one, not two, but three (or four? Or one?) villain to save the whole dang moon, and then Aquman and Mera face off against Hydro, the Dehydrator! His name isn’t stupid, you’re stupid, Mark!

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