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336: A Very Sticky Team-Up

IT’S TIME FOR ADVENTURE! Join us for a very special episode as Kyle steps into the sweet spider-chair of Madame Web to guide us on a role-playing game called “SPIDER and MAN” (as found on the wilds of Reddit)! Merk becomes Sticky! Bry becomes Skull Spider! Two Spider-Men of the Spider-Verse, tasked with protecting the Cosmic Cube! But when just entirely too many Green Goblins and Hobgoblins and Demogoblins (oh my) come gliding out of the woodwork to capture the Cube and plunge the multiverse into chaos, can our mismatched duo of Spider-Dudes roll the right dice to save the day? There’s only one way to find out: listening to this episode! This sticky, webby episode.

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327: KRAKAKOOM!

The lightning strikes once again! Last week was a longer episode, so this week it’s all random rapid-fire topics! We’re pit in a fight-inventing grudgematch between Prince Robot IV and Wolfsbane, under caaa-razy circumstances, and we decide the victor! We recast “The Eternals” with the great comedy actors of literally any era! Batman: Soul of the Dragon is a movie we think you should watch… now! Bry quizzes us with which Spider-Verse variants are real or fake! Kyle gets in on the quiz game as we have to guess if a list of characters were alive or dead in the year 2000! And then Merk steals the quizmaster crown to test our knowledge about what bizarre Defenders villains existed or not! All this and… wait, no, that’s it. That’s the show. It’s plenty of show!

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318: At the Speed of Snowplow!

Winter in comic books is kinda… weird, right? Like it rarely happens, and when it does it always seems to be over after a single issue or story-arc. And as semi-northern Canadians, we have a podcast episode to pick with that! But as semi-northern Canadians, we also appreciate it whenever it happens! So join us on a wintery journey through the snow-filled superhero comics that stuck with us (we’ve got TMNT *and* X-Men!), the inadequacies of superhero costumes in winter (tell us, HOW do Spider-Man’s lenses not constantly fog up when he’s wearing a mask?), and we pitch some new comic story ideas to make up for an otherwise lack of winter realism. Plus: Hulk in a snowsuit!! That sounds brrrrr– uh, great!

But… what’s this!? We give wintertime “normal jobs” to three random comic characters: Moon Knight vs. Hockey Parents! Quicksilver turns into a tow truck… Turbo Teen style, even! Fantomah helps (and causes) icy car accidents! And we talk about all the wildest news, from an abruptly-cancelled Luke Cage miniseries, a new comic about Starship Hulk, and Saga’s live-action debut!

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316: Celery Day Stalkslam

For thousands of years, the debate has raged: Christmas? Halloween? Which is the supreme holiday? Today we solve this decisively, once and for all, ion the typical manner of making a bunch of characters, each representing one of the two holidays, fight!

But first! We’ve got more “news” about the Ayer Cut, as well as the Diamond Distribution Hack and a new comic-based cartoon that just came out! Plus, we’re covering all of the Disney+ Day Marvel stuff in the Warmup!

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307: Wayne Knight’s Driving the Van

Once again, we are settling age old comic book debates this week. Is The Punisher a villain? What’s better, Kirby’s Marvel work or his DC work? Has Shazam always just been a Superman ripoff? Those questions and exactly three others will be answered.

Plus! We rank the various Sinster Six…es that have existed to find who among them is the most sinister, cover the ongoing Joe Bennett scandal, and rejoice that Gwensborn isn’t canon anymore.

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304: Shuma-Gorath Does Laundry on Mondays

This week, we’re tumbling out of bed and stumbling to the kitchen, pouring ourselves a cup of ambition, and yawning, stretching, and talking about super heroes with day jobs. From the ones with crappy jobs, like Hal Jordan selling toys door to door and Captain America being an artist for Marvel Comics pre-creators’ rights, to the ones we wish characters had, like Batman’s Discovery Channel hit, Keeping up with the Waynes, or Doctor Strange turning the Sanctum Sanctorum into a rooming house.

It even takes over our Warm Up, where we try to give jobs to a bunch of characters who don’t really have prescribed ones (spoiler: a lot of them just end up as bouncers at a strip club). And there’s news! You knew that! Get back to work!

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289: Moidawoild

Oh boy, they’ve really done it this time! Bry and Merk thought they won it big when they recieved some complimentary tickets to the local fair, but what they really won were two tickets deep into the heart of Murderworld! Can they escape before Arcade’s carnival of chaos consumes their corpses? Can Merk best a robotic Seth Green in tic tac toe? Is Bry not to be trusted with darts? And where’s Kyle? Find out this week on Zero Issues!

Also, we do news and a character storm, but after that description, I’m… I’m very winded.

Brought to you by beans! But not just any beans, but those fancy “energy beans” from Rose N’ Crantz Roasting Co! (Use the promo code zeroissues to save 10%!)

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287: Jim Cummings

Chocolate and peanut butter, cats and dogs living together, monkeys fighting lizards, that’s what this episode’s all about! We’re taking things that should not be together, and smashing them against each other like so many…smashy…thingies…

Moon Knight and The Question come to kick ass and chew bubble gum, Samus Aran fights a xenomorph, and Kyle mistakenly believes that Jim Cummings did the voice of Beastly on Care Bears! He didn’t! What a dummo!

Brought to you by our wicked smaht sponsor: Rose N Crantz Coffee! (Use the promo code zeroissues to save 10%!)

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275: Hope v Dickery: Debate of Superman

Superman: beacon of hope, or beacon of NOPE? That’s the question we grapple with today! Does Superman inspire humanity to greatness, or is he just a power-rich jerk in a dumb cape? Do other heroes better represent the hopeful ideal? (And what is “hope”, anyway? Sounds made-up!) We go to some places with this one!

PLUS! All the news you can listen to: Black Widow, the Dwayne McDuffie awards, Power Rangers on Kickstarter, Miles Morales, Scott Pilgrim, and… [sigh]… Morbius. And we create new characters improv-style in a special Superman-themed Character Storm!

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274: Several Issues Graphic Novel Podcast

Y’know, we as a podcast may have fallen victim to the super hero industrial complex. We used to talk about comics! This week we take a break from what’s going on in super hero books and TV shows and movies, and focus on some smaller stories, some very good graphic novels that we’ve ready recently.

Oh but before that, we cover Marvel movie and TV news that is mostly baseless rumours, and then talk about WandaVision for like fifteen minutes. Moderation!

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