hal jordan

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Classic Zero Issues 4: The Roast of Hal Jordan

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The Zero Issues July Vacation Classic Spectacular comes to a close! As the boys try to remember how they got to the blue side of the Moon, enjoy what may be the most classic “classic” of all:

From beautiful downtown Coast City, it’s a star studded event filled with laughs, tears, masked vigilantes and utter humiliation! It’s the ROAST OF HAL JORDAN!! Yes, the Green Lantern is in the crosshairs of his peers as they celebrate this legendary hero while, simultaneously, tearing a strip out of the emerald knight! Join Batman, Green Arrow, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, Kilowog, Guy Gardner and others as they… reminisce… about dear ol’ Hal. The early years. The awkward years. That mask that hides nothing… even his shame. Sponsored by Sinestro Industries.

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304: Shuma-Gorath Does Laundry on Mondays

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This week, we’re tumbling out of bed and stumbling to the kitchen, pouring ourselves a cup of ambition, and yawning, stretching, and talking about super heroes with day jobs. From the ones with crappy jobs, like Hal Jordan selling toys door to door and Captain America being an artist for Marvel Comics pre-creators’ rights, to the ones we wish characters had, like Batman’s Discovery Channel hit, Keeping up with the Waynes, or Doctor Strange turning the Sanctum Sanctorum into a rooming house.

It even takes over our Warm Up, where we try to give jobs to a bunch of characters who don’t really have prescribed ones (spoiler: a lot of them just end up as bouncers at a strip club). And there’s news! You knew that! Get back to work!

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298: It was a Fear Demon

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This week’s episode was all about Black Widow and Loki, and had huge spoilers for both, but then a fear demon showed up, and now it’s all about retcons! From Puck originally being 6’6″, to Hal Jordan not really being a dick after all, to Norman Osborn and Gwen Stacy getting all Brazzersy, sometimes comic creators make some very, hmm, interesting choices. So we gripe about them!

Also, more news than you can handle; and in the Warmup, we try to figure out where to put all of these comics before they trap us like Principal Skinner in the classic Simpsons episode “Bart the Murderer”.

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267: Butterscotch Wolverine

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Kramabadoom!!! This week’s a Lightning Round episode, and you know what that means: serious discussion about what kind of Green Goblin knockoff we’d like to be, what DC comic is best suited to feature Gamera, and wondering aloud if anyone actually enjoys knowing everything there is to know about Star Wars. All that and the debut of Canada’s yum-diddly-scrumpious super hero!

 

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265: Ionic Centipede

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Another week, another fun podcast! This week the boys are talking about offshoot characters. Characters like Thunderstrike, Great Grandma Thunderstrike, Strange Visitor, Superboy X (or whatever it was), Slingers, Young Avengers and so many more. We even make up our own ones…. which leads to the uncomfortable title of the episode…. Wonder Man, we’re sorry. All that and a read this now! Maestro! And a quiz! And learn about Kyle’s offshoot character!

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248: The Roast of Hal Jordan

Posted on by zeroissues

From beautiful downtown Coast City, it’s a star studded event filled with laughs, tears, masked vigilantes and utter humiliation! It’s the ROAST OF HAL JORDAN!! Yes, the Green Lantern is in the crosshairs of his peers as they celebrate this legendary hero while, simultaneously, tearing a strip out of the emerald knight! Join Batman, Green Arrow, Aquaman, Martian Manhunter, Kilowog, Guy Gardner and others as they…. reminisce…. about dear ol’ Hal. The early years. The awkward years. That mask that hides nothing….even his shame. Sponsored by Sinestro Industries. 

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206: TOO MUCH NEWS

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This week we catch up with the absolute hell of news that was announced in-between recording dates – from TV and movie announcements at D23 and beyond! And believe it or not, it’s not all Marvel! I mean, it’s like… 92% Marvel. But there are “Joker” reactions, Suicide Squad rumours, more Star Wars shows, and a friggin’ G.I. Joe spin-off! The MCU’s Phase 4 is steamrolling across the small and silver screens, but a certain web-slinger may be out of the picture thanks to a cross-corporation custody battle… But we’ve got the *real* scoop about an extremely not-fake conspiracy that’s torn Sony and Disney asunder!

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166: Going to Hal in a Handbasket on a Bicycle Built for Two Hals

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This week we discuss Henry Cavill’s possible exit from the Superman movies? Maybe? Is that what’s going on? Or is he going crazy? Or are we? All of the above? That and we talk about the Joker Phoenix, the weirdness behind the abrupt cancellation of Chelsea Cain’s Vision series, a game of Character Storm, the Winter Soldier’s back up dancers and Jughead just wanting $5! It’s JUST FIVE BUCKS!!! All that and more…. for FREE!!! You don’t even have to pay for this stuff!! IT’S FREE!!!!

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Episode 5: She’s Like Hal Jordan, But I Like Her

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Remember when your favourite comic character was someone else entirely? The boys talk about their favourite and least-favourite replacement superheroes! Also: Bry really hates Hal Jordan, Merk remembers the time he met Nightcrawler, and after his death last episode, Kyle is replaced by a revolving door of celebrity guests!

(And can you guess that this episode was recorded about a month ago!?)

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