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237: “Hawkman is His Safeword” or: “Daddy, I Want a Hawk!”

KAWW! This week we’re aiming to “fix” another under-appreciated or maligned character… this time, the Hecka Hard-to-follow Hawkman! Carter and/or Katar Hall is mostly famous for an extremely convoluted (even for comics) backstory and continuity. So we aim to do the impossible: pitch a Hawkman story that sells him as a character! What is the core appeal of Hawkman? What would he be without the wings? And what about him makes DC reboot-proof?

But first, we talk about some recent developments! DC is pushing ahead with a new distributor: is this good news to break the distribution monopoly or does it put shops in a bad position? The pandemic shutdown puts publishers in the pinch. A new Heavy Metal imprint goes… viral? And we talk about the recent miniseries “Superman Smashes the Klan”!



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236: Wonder Man is Your Responsibility

This week, we figure out who is the first among first among equals, with a very scientific, Tony Robbins-endorsed, leader-off! Cyclops, Nightwing, Captain America, Storm, Superman, Mister Fantastic, Black Panther: which one would you follow into battle? The answer may shock you!

Plus, we’ve absolutely lost our minds, and the news shows it.

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235: 3 Rosenbaums and a Snyder Cut

Well Easter just went by so it’s time for the boys to take a look at comic characters that come back from the dead….. so basically everyone. But they do explore the hilarity of a few like Jean Grey (obviously), Thor, Superman, Xavier (why do his kids keep killing him?), Bucky, Jason Todd, Aunt May and everyone’s favourite MR IMMORTAL!! We also take on a topic suggested by a listener, Manuel, where we delve into the monopoly that is Diamond Distribution. All that plus Didio talks New 52 & Rebirth, Comicsgate silliness and the amazing Marsha Cooke, and Michael Rosenbaum, Rosenbaum, ROSENBAUM!!! Join us (from an appropriate distance) won’t you?

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234: The Shredder’s a Real Blanche

30 years ago, the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was unleashed on the world! To comic fans of a, uh, certain age, this movie was a definitive cinema experience. But a lifetime later, how does it hold up? We discuss the legacy of this indie comics classic, compare it to the TMNT’s later adaptations, discuss its standing amongst the incredible growth of comic movies since, talk about our favourite moments, the bodacious cast, those Henson Company animatronic suits, a bunch of production trivia and goofs, little-known deleted scenes, and SO much more. It’s… Bossanova? …Chevy Nova? (Excellent!!)

Get your dose of Turtle Power in a very special Z-E-R-O ISSUES PODCAST!


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233: Colossus’s Magical Death Stench

In a very, very topical turn of events, this week’s episode is all about diseases and viruses in comic books. So, from the safety of our various bunkers (no, really, we’re all recording remotely, just like a real podcast!), we bring you the sickest episode yet. Do we talk about the Legacy Virus? Uh, you know it. The Clench? Yessuh. D…Death Stench? Yes, though I am honestly not sure why.

Heck, even our Warmup is disease infested, as we do the nastiest Character Storm to date. That, and an earful of news about the many shakeups that the comics industry is going through right now!

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232: Hex Hex Lightning Bolt Battling Covid 19

Self Isolation! Social Distancing! Disease Lockdown! How do i get my comics?!?! With all this craziness going on, we aren’t able to do a ‘regular’ stupid episode of the podcast…. so we’ve put together a ‘Special’ stupid episode of the podcast! Outtakes! Bloopers! Unreleased bits! Hilarity! We’re here to make you laugh and be silly in these weird, strange, dire toilet paper endtimes. So join us for a 30 minute rocket ride into our brains and laugh it up, fuzzballs, ’cause we’re using our HEX HEX LIGHTNING BOLT to battle COVID 19!

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231: But Does He Have a Butt Gun?

Our semi annual…er… bi-annual…. or…. whenever we fell it it….March Madness is back!!! We each secretly choose characters and then throw them into a round robin tournament… a battle to the last!! 8 comic characters whittled down to ONE CHAMPION!!! Several robots! One X-man! Two Japanese sourced warriors! One weird guy that does ‘criss cross apple sauce’! One symbol of a country! And one in fishnets that will throat punch you into next week! Join us for this battle to the last, as we ask ‘But does he have a butt gun?’

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230: So Let’s Talk About the Starfox in the Room

Starfox. Starfox! STARFOX! (Not that one.) Let’s not mince words: Eros the Eternal, Avenger, brother of Thanos, and defendant of lawsuits, is what you could call… problematic. “The power to stimulate the pleasure centre of the brain” maybe doesn’t play so well in 2020. So it’s up to us to fix him! We re-evaluate, refresh, re-cast, and even fully reboot the Titan known as Starfox to tell some stories that maybe won’t make you feel deeply uncomfortable!

But there’s more! Batman takes the stage – ninja style! Nathan Fillion’s arms may or may not fall off, boy! Michael Golden’s Micronauts gets a very macro release! And Merk quizzes Bry & Kyle on their ludicrous Marvel acronyms!

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229: A Batman who Washes His Ass

Holy smokes, did you know there’s a new Batman movie in the works right now, helmed by Matt Reeves and starring Robert Pattinson? So I guess there won’t be anyone else playing Batman after this, he’s the last one, nobody else will ever play Batman.

Despite this, we do our best to recast Batman and his allies and enemies, just in case they do ever decide to make another Batman movie. Y’know, just in case!

Plus: Dan DiDio’s ousting from DC, all the hot ToyFair news, the cast reveal for Kevin Smith’s Masters of the Universe: Revelation, and Kyle tells us about The Fourth Planet, a comic series from someone we aren’t attempting to fource a bitter rivalry with.

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228: They Finally Killed Damascusdy Dragony

This week, we’ve got the power! POWER RECORDS, that is! We’re doing the riff-along thing again as we react to a weird Spider-Man LP story from 1975: “Invasion of the Dragon Men”! What is the secret of Draco, the Dragon-Man from the skies? Why is Peter Parker tweaking? Who is the 80-year-old chain smoker college student? How many voices can Rodney, the only Power Records voice actor, pull off? All this and more!!



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