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444: It’s the Dude from the Card!

This week, we’re spending most of the episode playing Battle Holes, the card game that uses comic book trading cards from the ’90s. You could always play it yourself using, oh, some cards that are readily being given away from certain Canadian monopolistic, price-gouging grocery stores, as well, but Merk owns a bunch of trading cards from the ’90s, so we’re doing that. Can Polaris beat Spider-Man? Can Spider-Man beat Magneto? Can Silvermane do anything other than scoot around, his head bolted to the top of an RC car?

All that, and we also rank every Batman cartoon, so nobody else has to, because we’ve already done it.

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443: We Stan a Fat Alfred

Zero Issues Comic Podcast
Zero Issues Comic Podcast
443: We Stan a Fat Alfred
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Batman: Caped Crusader is here, we’ve all seen it, so we’re gonna talk all about it, see? And just upfront, we really liked it! We dig into the 1939-ish time period and all the trappings that come with it, share our favourite episodes, discuss the creators and their influences and of course the inevitable Batman the Animated Series comparisons, the performances of the cast (Minnie Driver’s in this??), share thoughts on the various (and sometimes fiercely controversial?) changes to classic villains, and dig into the many potential influences that give this show its distinct flavour. Spoilers a-plenty, and maybe an actual Spoiler, who knows!

But first, we imagine similar animated approaches to other comics characters, if they were set in a specific era or with a specific stylistic approach! Like a very ’70s comic-horror Swamp Thing show! Or the “new class” X-Men in individual animation styles representing their cultural backgrounds! Perhaps a swingin’ ’60s animated series of the Fantastic Four! Hey, let Daredevil get ’80s gritty in animated form, willya? Or let’s see Wonder Woman in the same WWII era as Caped Crusader! And howzabout a “Blue-Eyed Samurai”-style Conan the Barbarian? All this and more!

Zero Issues #443: We Stan a Fat Alfred

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442: Knull – Player 2 Marvel Dracula and other Symbiote Stuff

The Trailer for Venom 3 has come out and 5 minutes have gone by since we’ve seen a symbiote centered comic event, so let’s talk SYMBIOTES!
What do we think of them? How have they evolved? What are some ridiculous symbiote pitches?
How many times can we say Gold Balls and Wheat cakes in one episode?
Who’s Eye Scream?
What’s Gamecock’s Symbiote Name?
Who’s all together gacky?
All these questions and MORE will be answered this week on Zero Issues Comic Podcast!

Zero Issues #442: Knull - Player 2 Marvel Dracula and Other Symbiote Stuff

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441: Taped to a Mace

Zero Issues Comic Podcast
Zero Issues Comic Podcast
441: Taped to a Mace
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Beeeeest friiiieeeeeends! That’s what we’re talkin’ ’bout this week. We’re answering such age-old questions as:
-who actually IS Spider-Man’s best friend?
-Is Hank Pym a jerk because no one wants to hang out with him, because he is a jerk, because no one wants to hang out with him…?
-Is it possible to be best friends with someone if you’ve only met them in crossover fighting games? Because if it isn’t, I don’t want to be the one to tell Cyclops and Ryu.
All that, plus some spoiler-heavy talk about Deadpool & Wolverine, because, look, we’re pretty sure you’ve seen it by now, bud.
Zero Issues #441: Taped to a Mace!

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440: It’s a Bit Like Herding Xenomorphs

Zero Issues Comic Podcast
Zero Issues Comic Podcast
440: It's a Bit Like Herding Xenomorphs
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Class warfare! In this time of inequality and ever-rising costs of living, it’s time to take a look at superheroes living on very different sides of the class divide! The working class heroes with day jobs and the upper iron crust who can afford to be as relaxed as Robert Downey Jr.!

We dig into many questions: Should Peter Parker even be able to afford rent in Manhattan? Is Tony Stark a nepo baby? Is there a better use for the many wings of Wayne Manor that Batman probably never sets foot in? Are there any actual “self-made” superhero billionaires? Is it even possible for telapaths like Emma Frost to make their riches ethically (no, and she doesn’t care)? Is Matt Murdock in the 1%? What are the ethics of a superhero owning a corporation or being a landlord? And why do so many mutants come from old money, anyway?

But first! We make up new heroes and villains on the spot in a new Character Storm! this time inspired by… targeted ads!? About time they were good for something. Prepare for the sensational character finds of 2024: Black Silk! Muscle Duck! And Creatino, the Cowboy Cat! All this and superhero science, sort of? So much value in this episode!

 

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439: Equal Opportunity Stink

Zero Issues Comic Podcast
Zero Issues Comic Podcast
439: Equal Opportunity Stink
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It’s alternate ending week on Zero Issues as the boys take well known comic storylines and do a little ‘tweaking’ of the story…. sometimes for good…. sometimes for evil.
Onslaught! Hush! Superman vs the Flash! And more!
Plus Merk has a new warm up filled with ridiculous questions.
Hear answers like…
Uncle Sam becomes a cannibal!
Jughead becomes Burger Smasher Spawn!
Weird Al joins the Justice League!
And lots more. Join us!

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438: Frank Miller’s Love Chunks

Zero Issues Comic Podcast
Zero Issues Comic Podcast
438: Frank Miller's Love Chunks
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This week, our city screams (not unlike a certain Robot Cop screaming for Oreos) that it wants us to talk about Frank Miller, and we, our city’s, uh, lover, are honour-bound to oblige it! What was our first exposure to the guy’s work? What do we like about him, and what do we hate almost as much as Holy Terror? Have any of us even read Ronin? Could a certain seldom-read Frank Miller book that isn’t Sin City replace The Boys when it ends?

All that, and a very special Frank Miller-themed Characterstorm!

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437: No Ice Cream Until You Join The Defenders

Zero Issues Comic Podcast
Zero Issues Comic Podcast
437: No Ice Cream Until You Join The Defenders
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The question all comic fans have wrestled with their whole lives! Which member of The Defenders is the best Defender!? We take five, uh, famous Defenders — The Silver Surfer! Hellcat! Nighthawk! Moondragon! Valkyrie! — and pit them against each other in some very essential Defenders challenges! How convincingly would the Silver Surfer pretend to be Batman in order to help protect Bruce Wayne’s secret identity? How would Moondragon fare in the very real and very serious art of dressage (y’know, fancy horse dancing)? Is it possible Valkyrie would be the absolute best at telling scary campfire stories? Can fancy rich boy Nighthawk possibly compete in a proper hot-dog eating contest? And how do we feel about the vampire and/or vampyr-slaying abilities of Patsy Walker, the Hellcat? All this, and more rankings, and more tangents, and phone calculator functions, for you, all for you!

But first, in honour (with a U) of the late, great Donald Sutherland, we posthumously discuss which comic characters he could have brought to life in a way only he could! Galactus! Colonel Weird (from “Black Hammer”)! The Watcher! DC’s Uncle Sam! Khonshu! The Spectre! And, unfortunately, this segment is how Kyle learned that Donald Sutherland had passed. (Sorry, Kyle.)

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436: King Bee of a World Hive

Zero Issues Comic Podcast
Zero Issues Comic Podcast
436: King Bee of a World Hive
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It’s POWER RECORDS week on Zero Issues, where we listen to not one, but TWO ridiculously amazing DC Power Records from decades ago. Comics on vinyl! First up is Superman- PO Box 65 …. a riveting tale of a Beatles like band kidnapped by someone who doesn’t know much about computers and Superman quietly admitting to leaving people to die on a desert island that he dropped a comet on to.
And THEN, it’s Batman- Gorilla City! A riveting tale where Batman gets his @$$ handed to him MULTIPLE times in increasingly strange ways.
Join us for the fun!

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